When God was creating mothers,He was into His
sixth day of "overtime" when an angel appeared
and said"You're doing a lot of fiddling around
on this one.And God said,Have you read the
specifications on this order She has to be
completely washable but not plastic.Have 180
moveable parts....all replaceable.Run on black
coffee and leftovers.Have a lap that disappears
when she stands up. A kiss that can cure anything
from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair
And, six pairs of hands." The angel shook her
head slowly and said "Six pairs of hands..
no way."
"It's not the hands that are causing me problems
said God, "It's the three pairs of eyes that
mothers have to have."That's on the standard
model?" asked the angel.God nodded."One pair
that sees through closed doors when she asks,
'What are you kids doing in there?' when she
already knows. Another here in the back of her
head that sees what she shouldn't but what she
has to know, and of course, the ones here in
front that can look at a child when he goofs
up and say, 'I understand and I love you',
without so much as uttering a word."
"You should scrap it and start over."said the
angel."I can't," said God, "I'm so close to
creating something so close to myself. Already
I have one who heals herself when she is sick.
can feed a family of six on one pound of
hamburger...and can get a nine-year-old to
stand under a shower."The angel circled the model
of a mother very slowly."It's too soft,"she sighed.
"But tough," said God excitedly."You cannot
imagine what this mother can do or endure."
"Can it think?" asked the angel."Not only think,
but it can reason and compromise."said the Creator.
Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger
across the cheek. "There's a leak!" she pronounced.
"I told you you're trying too put too much into
this model.It's not a leak" said God "it's a tear."
"What's it for?" asked the angel."It's for joy,
sadness,disappointment,pain,loneliness,and pride."
"You are a genius!" said the angel.
God looked somber....."I didn't put it there."
Erma Bombeck.
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